Grumpy

This moment's view from the window. The big gangly birch.
This moment's view in the mirror. The writer with no face : )

I woke up feeling wonderful. It didn't last long. I was just grumpy after a while. For no apparent reason. And this would be fine if I didn't care if I was grumpy. How is it that we can't just be as we are? Happy. Sneezy. Grumpy. Or whatever it is. Somehow I have had this idea that I should always be "in a good mood". But if I allow myself to feel grumpy if I am and be okay with it - then wow! I feel okay! I think we always want our children to be happy and in this way we work hard to have happy children. My parents for me. Me for my girls. And we get the idea that this is all we should be and we hide our grumpiness, our sadnesses, our meannesses. All these feelings are passing phenomenon. Just coming and going. It's a wonderful thing when we don't take them too seriously. It's not about us. It's just feeling flowing through. Watch it. Allow it. The miracle is that the feelings always flow - like through a water pipe. Let them go. Let them flow. It's not helpful to bend the pipe so you can see what's in there or why it's in there. It stops the flow.
There! That's what I think. : )
Dancing to Lady GaGa and her heartbeat music helped me a lot today. "Bang, bang, bang....boys, boys, boys.......dirty, dirty rich.......cherry, cherry boom, boom. It's hard to be serious!